Navigating the Peer-to-Boss Transition
“An authentic environment – one where transitions, elephants in the room, and real challenges get named – is a breath of fresh air for most teams.”
A common workplace leadership conundrum is when one rising leader, among a group of peers, becomes the boss of that team. Has this ever happened to you?
Suddenly your work friends will soon be your direct reports and with that comes a whole new set of challenges. You worry about what this will do to your friendship and the weekly coffee runs or advice phone calls you don’t want to lose. You’re also concerned about how you'll be able to be the most effective leader you can be with the relational changes looming.
Navigating this transition can be emotionally confusing and relationally tricky, which can distract rising leaders like you from learning your new leadership role. Worse, it can derail your success if there is lingering resentment that starts to calcify.
With a conscious, transparent approach; however, you can navigate the leadership transition from peer to boss with grace and success.
What You as a Leader Can Do When You Become the Boss of Your Peers
Approaching this transition with care and confidence can make a huge difference in the ease and success you create. Here are three leader-based approaches to consider as you make this transition.
1. Name the Change
Actually name the fact of the transition out loud, to the colleagues whose relationships you're concerned about. If you don't name the circumstance, it remains as an 'elephant in the room' that can create tension. A huge indicator of team trust is the ability to express what we're truly thinking with each other, so you want to establish that norm right out of the gate.
What it looks like when leaders name the change:
"I know this can be an awkward transition, and I want to get that on the table so we can navigate it as openly as possible."
"I'm nervous about the ways our relationship might change because I enjoyed how it was before."
"It's really important for me to support you in getting what you want in your career development."
2. Invite Continued Transparency
You've led the beginning of the transition with transparency if you've done step one, so here's your chance to keep it going.
As the leader, you're on a learning curve in your new role. You can name that and invite continued openness that will support ongoing alignment. Set up regular 1-1s and show up to them prepared and present. You could even have a standard agenda item about the transition paired with an open question: "How's the transition going?"
As peers, you probably talked about a myriad of workplace challenges. That might have included your former boss, organizational changes, and project-specific hurdles. Your peer may have been a key confidante for you. Now, as their boss, you know there are times where you'll have to choose diplomacy over risking partiality. You can still discuss former workplace topics in confidence while also remaining constructive.
What it looks like when leaders promote continued transparency:
"In our weekly 1-1s, I'd like to continue to check in and be open with each other about how the transition is going."
"This is all new for me and your partnership and feedback is so valuable."
3. See your Role as Bringing Clarity and Alignment
The main reason this transition can feel so awkward is because of the concept of "boss". If you as the leader can reframe that, and help your team reframe it also, the concept will be more supportive and less oppressive.
Yes, technically speaking, you are the boss now – the power dynamic has shifted and you're responsible for assessing performance. Yet, you’re also seeing your leadership role as someone who provides clarity and builds alignment so the team can do its job.
This is a shift for your leader mindset, which will translate into a more constructive tone that conveys ‘power with’ rather than “power over.”
What it looks like when leaders see their role as building clarity and alignment:
Share what you're seeing from your new seat about trends, strategy, and insight
Be the conduit for organizational news and decisions trickling down
Advocate up and across for your team members
Final Thoughts On Becoming the Boss of Your Peers
It may be awkward and that's ok. Don't let the awkwardness cause you to go dark on your former peers. Lean into it. Don't judge it. Keep it real. An authentic environment where transitions, elephants in the room, and real challenges get named is a breath of fresh air for most teams. You can be the leader they've always wanted, and you have a strong foundation to start on!
Need help navigating a leadership role shift and team relationships? Book a consultation to begin.
