Three Ways to Start Being More Direct
When I think about professional relationships that have lasted years, they're the ones where we have real, sometimes uncomfortable conversations about our working dynamics. I've found that I trust these relationships more because there’s clarity, mutual respect, and no need to guess where I stand. I know I can count on those colleagues to be direct and honest when something needs to be addressed.
For some leaders, being direct in communication with team members can feel hard. We worry that sounding harsh, being misunderstood, or creating tension will do more damage than good. Sometimes we avoid the conversation because it just feels easier that way. But by doing so, we are also missing out.
The truth is, being direct in a warm, clear tone saves us time, energy, and confusion in the long run. It represents leading with integrity and intention.
When we're clear, we're predictable. And predictability creates trust.
Here are three ways leaders can practice leading with directness to build respect and trust with their teams:
1. Outline Your Intention:
Before having the conversation, clarify your purpose. Answer the following question for yourself: What do I want to communicate? What outcome do I hope to get from this conversation?
2. Use Simple and Specific Language:
It’s normal to feel nervous when something needs to be addressed with a colleague. Sometimes, that nervousness leads to over-explaining, which can leave others more confused about what you’re trying to communicate. Consider naming the specific situation and kindly asking for what you need moving forward.
3. Get Curious:
Being direct means being honest and human. Try pairing your direct statement with a curious invitation to show openness: Here's what I'm noticing...what are your thoughts? This also helps you deliver with both directness and humility.
Directness, combined with openness, creates psychologically safe relationships. When we lead with intention and address issues in a simple, straightforward, yet curious way, we create teams rooted in trust and accountability.
