How to Help a Team Member Leave Well
Surprise. Abandonment. Awkwardness. These are often the common sentiments on a team when someone leaves.
But… what if it didn't have to be this way?
When you start with that mindset and expectation, the whole experience can be much more positive for everyone involved.
And, if you're tuned in, it might not come as a surprise. Often, when it's time for a change in team composition, everyone feels it. That’s why it doesn’t have to be an elephant in the room.
Helping your team members leave well keeps the relationship intact, increases psychological safety for the remaining team members, and helps the work that's left behind get handled more efficiently.
Here is how to lead someone to leave well.
One colleague recently described previous jobs they'd left as such an isolating and awkward experience.
"As soon as I told them I was leaving, it was like we were strangers. What about the fact that we'd worked so closely together for the last two years?"
When someone leaves, you, as the leader, can support a process that maintains a transparent, positive culture. It's as simple as the following three steps.
Hold an intentional 'goodbye' meeting
Bring the team together to acknowledge the transition. This alone has strong symbolic power. It makes the person leaving feel seen and lets the team close the chapter together.
Honor the person and their lasting contribution
Design a process where the team acknowledges something they appreciate about this person, perhaps something they learned about themselves or the team from the person's presence on the team.
Ask for the closure you need
Leadership requires vulnerability. One example of being vulnerable is asking what might have been meant by a certain phrase or behavior, if that would give you closure. When one client's team member shared that she was leaving, she mentioned feeling "out of sync" with the work, so I encouraged the client to ask what this meant. The answer brought clarity and insight.
Obviously, a cultural foundation of trust and transparency will make these ‘leaving well’ rituals feel more natural, but you have to start somewhere.
Reach out if we can help you design a process to support someone leaving well on your team.
